What I miss the most about him is the way he used to lie down next to me at night, sometimes his arm would stretch along my chest and I couldn’t move. I even held my breath. But I felt safe, complete. And I miss the way he was whistling walking down the street and every time I do something I think of what he would say, ‘well it’s cold today, wear a scarf’. But lately I have been forgetting little things, he is sort of fading and I am starting to forget him and it’s like losing him again. So sometimes, I make myself remember every detail of his face, the exact color of his eyes, his lips, his cheeks, the texture of his skin, his hair that was all gone by the time he went. And sometimes, not always, but sometimes I actually see him. It’s as if a cloud moves away and he is there, I could almost touch him but then the real world rushes in and he vanishes again. Well I did this every morning when the sun was not too bright outside, the sun somehow makes him vanish, as he appears and he disappears like a sunrise and sunset or anything so ephemeral, just like our life we appear and we disappear and we are so important to some, but we are just passing through.