so i just bought The Princess Bride book and when i got home i read the front cover carefully [cause who looks at the cover that closely when all you see is THE PRINCESS BRIDE] and saw ‘the good parts’ version, abridged’, thought i’d been jibbed into buying those CHILDREN EDITION books and panicked for a full five minutes thinking oh no i don’t want to return it partly because i’m lazy and partly because i didn’t want them i think i’d read it and returned it like a dodgy consumer because who does that and then i decided to do what i should have done five minutes ago and googled THE PRINCESS BRIDE ABRIDGED ???????????? and well, it’s a joke.
well played Mr. Goldman. well played.
the worst is when you’re reading a really good book that follows multiple characters’ stories and you love it 90% of the time until it periodically switches back to that one character’s story that you just could not care less about and it’s like an entire chapter of internal groaning while waiting for the plot to switch back to a character you actually care about
“ Read not to contradict and confute; nor to believe and take for granted; nor to find talk and discourse; but to weigh and consider. Some books are to be tasted, others to be swallowed, and some few to be chewed and digested: that is, some books are to be read only in parts, others to be read, but not curiously, and some few to be read wholly, and with diligence and attention. ”
“ Books. People have no idea how beautiful books are. How they taste on your fingers. How bright everything is when you light it with words. ”
Rachel Kadish, Tolstoy Lied: A Love Story
“ So Matilda’s strong young mind continued to grow, nurtured by the voices of all those authors who had sent their books out into the world like ships on the sea. These books gave Matilda a hopeful and comforting message: You are not alone. ”
“ Generally speaking, books don’t cause much harm. Except when you read them, that is. Then they cause all kinds of problems. ”
“ We are the children of a technological age. We have found streamlined ways of doing much of our routine work. Printing is no longer the only way of reproducing books. Reading them, however, has not changed. ”