A letter from Charlotte Brontë to Henry Nussey (5 March 1839), in which she turned down his marriage proposal.
"Before answering your letter, I might have spent a long time in consideration of its subject; but as from the first moment of its reception and perusal I determined on which course to pursue, it seemed to me that delay was wholly unnecessary. You are aware that I have many reasons to feel gratified to your family, that I have peculiar reasons for affection towards one at least of your sisters, and also that I highly esteem yourself. Do not therefore accuse me of wrong motives when I say that my answer to your proposal must be a decided negative. In forming this answer — I trust I have listened to the dictates of conscience more than to those of inclination; I have no personal repugnance to the idea of a union with you — but I feel convinced that mine is not the sort of disposition calculated to form the happiness of a man like you. It has always been my habit to study the character of those amongst whom I chance to be thrown, and I think I know yours and can imagine what description of woman would suit you for a wife. Her character should not be too marked, ardent and original — her temper should be mild, her piety undoubted, her spirits even and cheerful, and her 'personal attractions' sufficient to please your eye and gratify your just pride. As for me, you do not know me, I am not this serious, grave, cool-headed individual you suppose — You would think me romantic and eccentric — you would say I was satirical and severe. However, I scorn deceit and I will never for the sake of attaining the distinction of matrimony and escaping the stigma of an old maid take a worthy man whom I am conscious I cannot render happy.”
After becoming curate of the parish church of Earnley, near Chichester, Henry had begun to search for an appropriate wife. He had known Charlotte through her friendship with his younger sister, Ellen, from about 1835. Her polite demurral seemingly aroused no apparent resentment on the part of the Nusseys, nor does it seem to have weighed on Charlotte’s mind, for she remained on companiable terms with Henry for many years.
“ I have not been trampled on. I have not been petrified. I have not been buried with inferior minds, and excluded from every glimpse of communion with what is bright and energetic, and high. I have talked, face to face, with what reverence; with what I delight in, - with an original, vigorous, an expanded mind. ”
Charlotte Brontë, Jane Eyre
“ Life is so constructed that an event does not, cannot, will not, match the expectation. ”
'I do love you,’ I said, ‘more than ever: but I must not show or indulge the feeling: and this is the last time I must express it.’
'The last time, Jane! What! do you think you can live with me, and see me daily, and yet, if you still love me, be always cold and distant?'
Edward Rochester: I dream.
Jane Eyre: Awaken then.